Well, here goes nothin' I suppose. I'm documenting my journey, so when I'm feeling discouraged and low, I can come back here and see from whence I came, so to speak. And, if, by some miracle, I can be a blessing to another who is in my shoes later down the road, well, I'll take that, too.
My back story:
I have tried for my whole adult life to be fit, lose weight, or just get off my bee-hind and get moving.
Admittedly, those efforts have been sporadic, frantic, motivated by depression, or something along those lines.
I have watched The Biggest Loser every season, sitting on the couch, eating a bowl of ice cream, with determination to get serious.
I have done "boot camp" at the YMCA, and been cheered on by the very people who, when I came to the first class, looked at me with disdain, no doubt thinking, "Well, here's the fat chick. SHE'LL never make it." Then when I came back for class after class, realized I was sticking to it.
Then when the class was over, I went back to the couch.
I have cried many tears about my weight and general lack of fitness. I don't want to cry anymore. I want to take control.
Back in January I went on a cruise for my sister-in-law's wedding, where I met her best friend. On the cruise, she took an opportunity to speak to me about my weight. I have heard it all.
"You'd be so beautiful, if you lost a few pounds, or a hundred."
"Do it for your children."
"Do it for yourself."
yada, yada....
Well, she told me something I'd never heard before.
"I was 20 years old when I lost my mother because of her obesity. Please don't leave your children without their mother."
Ouch.
Then, to make it a one-two punch, my husband told me that he's lost without me and really, really doesn't want to be alone.
Double ouch.
So I came home and went to the doctor to see what I could do. I was pretty set on having surgery to help me lose my excess weight. I had already talked to her about it, and she was on board way back when, but I had chickened out and gone all ostrich about my weight again, burying my head in the sand, while softening the blow with oreo cookies and drowning my pain in milk.
This time I wasn't going to do that again. She told me to start researching my insurance requirements, and she'd start documenting my weight loss efforts again. Meanwhile, she suggested I begin taking MIC Ultra injections and eating a low carb diet. And she put me on a daily injectable blood sugar regulator, called Victoza.
As I was doing the insurance legwork, to my amazement, my weight started slipping off. The shots, coupled with the low carb diet, were working. So I decided to keep doing it. Pretty soon, people started noticing and commenting. Encouragement poured in. 40-45 lbs later, I quit my very physical job and my weight loss stalled.
No exercise = no weight loss...
Duh.
Plus, the budget no longer supported the cost of the weekly MIC Ultra injections.
The carbs crept back in...
The pounds crept back on...
And I said, "NO!!"
So, now, thanks to a side job and a compassionate sister, who wants me to be around for a while, I'm back at it. I gained back 10 of the pounds I had lost, but I'm working out now with a trainer 4-5 days a week, and she's a pusher.
I have somewhere around 100 pounds to lose, which seems quite impossible, but there you have it. Sometime soon, I'll post a widget with some sort of visual aid to help me see my goal, and watch my progress. You know, when I get techno-savvy, or when pigs fly, whichever comes first...
Current weight: 258.
So, who's with me?
I'm with ya! I've been doing Leslie Sansone Walk at Home DVDs for the past few months. I don't have money for the gym or to see a doc for shots so I'm doing what I can.
ReplyDeleteI've shed the same amount of tears and have comforted myself with just as much oreos. I've finally found some supplements to help with my whack-a-do hormones. The bummer is while I've lost inches - not so much weight. Blah, blah I know I've gained a lot of muscle but still.
Unless my scale truly is evil and is crazier than I am. Which is what I've suspected all along. :)