I had a good laugh with the Lord this morning. Actually, it began with tears, then swelled into laughter as I realized what I was saying to Him.
Recently I posted on my facebook page something about how awesome it is that whatever I am trying to teach my children always coincides with what God is teaching me. Those weren't the exact words, but it was close. So yesterday Hailey and I had a typical altercation, wherin I told her to do something and she came back with all the reasons why she didn't need to do it. As you can expect, it escalated into a fight. She even went so far as to accuse me of picking the fight. I turned it right back on her. I told her that I did not accept responsibility for the friction between us, because I have been training her for fourteen years to just OBEY, and if she had just done THAT, there would have been no fight at all.
Fast forward to today. As I was in the shower pouring my heart out to the Lord, I broke down in tears and confessed my sin of disobedience. I wasn't at all obedient over the weekend. Oh, I stayed within my points, but that isn't the, er... point. I did not eat right at lunch yesterday. I did all the things I know better than to do. I ate standing up. I ate too quickly. I ate right over the food, as if I were a dog, who had to guard the food bowl, lest another dog get any of it. I ate a second helping, even though I heard God clearly tell me to put it down. But I had all the excuses flying in my head and I exercised zero self-control.
So this morning I got up with a resolve to do better. To BE better.
Who am I kidding?
I have all the resolve of an Olympic athlete to work out in the morning, as I lie in my bed at night. Then the morning comes and I have a headache. Or a hip ache. Or my foot feels like it's broken.
So I excuse myself.
The same thing goes for eating. I resolve to eat healthy portions. I plan just what I will eat. Then I fix my plate, and my portion looks pitiful, so I super-size it. I have no strength to say no to my mouth.
Meanwhile, in the shower, I was confessing these things to God, and telling Him I have no strength to make right choices, asking for His supernatural strength, reminding Him of His promises, and praising Him that He is a promise keeper. Just then I said these words, "Please give me the strength to just obey instead of arguing with You." And it hit me. I burst out laughing!
God made me her mother. God knew that I needed her to remind me of who I am. He loved me enough to give me a perfect mirror of myself to raise, so I would hear His voice.
He is so amazing!